Wednesday, January 13, 2010

Pattern of Men

I let the men in my life walk all over me. They treat me like crap, they apologize, and then we move on. I feel like a door mat, and I don't know how to change it. I don't want families to be destroyed because of it, so I forgive them when they apologize, but then they do it again, or I fear they will do it again. I don't know what I am doing wrong because I deserve some respect, and I am not getting any. I certainly don't get any from MY KIDS, who I swear are 13 and 15, not 3 and 5. Do they continue the pattern because I do forgive them? HOW DO I FIX THIS???? I feel like I am some sort of mentally ill person that just shampoos, rinses and repeats. . .over and over and over again!


Brad said...

Don't know your exact situation but I will only say that maybe they continue because you don't really forgive them in the first place and your actions/attitude toward them from then on cause their lack of respect. Like I said I don't know the situation so don't crucify me for giving an opinion on a possible solution when I could be miles off!

Colleen said...

Thank you for a different look at it Brad. I would never crucify, I only put it out there to really get some different perspectives and advice!!! I think forgiveness is something I could definitely improve upon.

Anonymous said...

no advice - you know I'm terrible at that. BUT MAN am I hearing you this morning on this one!!!!

When did we become the doormat.... I suppose we let it happen. Very interesting perspective from Brad and probably true. It's a never ending catch 22 maybe.

The only benefit is I clean faster when I'm angry.

Kris and Jen said...

Oh Shannon, I too am a cleaning machine when I am angry!LOL! I can channel the anger and I feel I have control over SOMETHING because lord knows it is not my emotions:) Colleen your kids do respect you evidenced by the way they look at you :) and the way they treat others,which is respectfully. You taught them that and they might not show it all the time but that is because you are their mom, the constant in their life that they count on to forgive them no matter how much BS they throw your way. Unconditional love and forgiveness is exactly what you give and hopefully what you will receive:) Now as far as the other people (or men) in your life...I'm out on those:) XXXXX